The pain, the pain without quarter!
Friday, October 30, 2009 at 6:36AM 
I keep seeing more and more of these text block tattoos, and I have to tell you, I find them utterly mortifying.
Not because I dislike tattoos. I don't. I like them. I actually have one.
But these things--I can't decide whether they make me want to laugh or cry. I mean, I realize there are plenty of regrettable flash-art images one can have permanently applied. But a rose, a heart, a thorny anklet--they're all relatively innocuous. There's something so affected, so pretentious, so laughably supercilious about a teenager INSISTING THAT PEOPLE READ HER.
Seriously. A 17 year old stumbles across some ridiculous bunch of Jonathon Livingston Seagull-style drivel, thinks it is the most profound (sob!) thing (sob!) she's ever (sob!) seen (sob!), and instead of adding it (scribbling) to her Facebook (it) profile or making (all) it into her (over) desktop wallpaper (her) or even a giant mural (Trapper) on her bedroom (Keeper) wall, ferfucksake, she HAS IT PERMANENTLY INCISED INTO HER FLESH.
Do you remember what you considered deep and profound when you were 17? I do. And I am so fucking grateful I'm not going to have to shell out thousands of dollars to have 158 little grey smudges* that used to be the lyrics to Led Zeppelin's No Quarter LASERed off my rib cage.
* Has no one explained to these kids that tattoos bleed/degrade over time?
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Reader Comments (14)
Just gonna go with an "ugh" at that image and an "I agree" with your text.
Oy.
I like tattoos and have several, but textual tattoos bug me. I've never been able to articulate exactly why. I think you've identified a couple of reasons.
I think if you're gonna have words on your body, cowboy up and do it old skool: Figure out how to say in 8 letters or fewer and put it on your knuckles!
One of my colleague's kids has just had eyelets pierced in to his back so he can LACE HIS BACK UP.
I will never really understand why people do these things. I always tell myself that I chose to rebel by NOT having tattoos and piercings. As time goes on that gets more true. Though as an accountant I don't suppose rebelling is what we do.
OH.
DEAR.
LORDY.
can you make them stoppit???
Quisp, you make me waff and waff!
:)
I blame Angelina Jolie. I see she now has Brad doing it on his buttcrack.
There's a joke in there somewhere....
Karen, oy, indeed.
Quisp, oh hell yeah. ;)
BagLady, you know, I'm all for individual expression, but there's nothing wrong with a little common sense, either. And young'uns, please don't insult me with a, "My tattoo is for ME!" claim, because if it were, you'd have had it done upside down. Or backwards. So YOU could read it. Instead of US.
Heddah, I'm sorry. I cannot make them stop.
Natalie, did you see that photo of his new tattoo? When did he turn into my dad? He looks like he should be driving his golf cart around the retirement community. You dodged a bullet, Jen!
Seriously.
I'm investing in Laser tattoo removal.
I say it'll start to really take off in about 10 years or so
I don't know, Rada. I'm willing to bet that within the next five years, they'll come up with a new and much more effective removal procedure, and everyone who invested in uber-expensive medical LASER equipment will be very, very sad.
Have you seen the results of LASER tattoo removal? It leaves a scar that looks like a "ghost" of the old tattoo. Not nice.
Yes, I saw the photo and, well, that hat and kids... That's what turns him into an old man. And, well, let's be frank: living with Angelie cannot be all that and she seems so high maintenance that he looks kinda frazzled, too. He is her tether and it weighs on him. Plus, she's so boney... maybe she's pokin' him and he gets all deflated or something. I don't know. Seems nutso. Yeah, Jen got off easy!
And, God, that's a lot of kids. I don't care how much money one has... that's a lot of kids!
Natalie, some men like crazy bitches. Personally, I've always thought that people who aggressively seek the crazy should be rewarded with lots of it.
Hahahahaha!
I have a tat, just got it this summer and love it. But I'm in my 50-'s and seeing blocks of text like this makes me wonder what it will turn into when I'm in my 80's...the sagging skin will surely change the meaning of the text!! YIKES!
Adchick, you know, I hate to admit it, but the whole aging skin thing was the primary reason I got my tattoo on the side of my calf above my ankle bone. I've never actually seen a woman with sagging calves. Heh.
yeah.
I saw a woman with a giant dragon from shoulder blade to shoulder blade that she was clearly having removed.
I venture to think that camoflauge make up would have made it look better than the scarring that I saw.